Misadventures of the Monster Librarian

Today was one of those slightly rainy days, though by the time I got off the expressway it had stopped raining. My friend who grew up in Virginia used to say of days like these that it was "spitting" outside. I never really liked the idea of that expression, as though Cherabim and Seraphim, bored with their idle days spent on playing harps and singing in the Almighty's choir decided to see who could spit the farthest. Well, anyway, it is cloudy and in the fifties and perfectly perfect outside and I am indoors working the early morning shift, with my Reference partner in crime due in in a little over an hour. It is a quiet enough day here. I have responded to 5 reference questions in the last 45 minutes, 4 of those coming from the same man. High maintenance. It is in these quiet times that my mind wanders and I fall into fantasizing about some tall gorgeous man striding through the doors, over to the desk, and saying to me in his sexiest voice, "hi, you don't know...

Does anyone else think that it is weird that we are taught not to trust or rely on google.com because of all the misinformation that could be on the sites that pop up when you do searches, etc., but when you do a search on ALA's website they put you into a google search....uuummm? Just some pre-lunch thoughts! ~Monster 10:46 AM - 0

"God, I just heard a noise. I hope it's not a serial killer. Ever since I saw that movie Halloween I am paranoid about serial killers. Any one of Finch's patients could be one. Especially that crazy lady that owns the Blue Moon Grill in Easthampton. I just look at her and she creeps me out. She looks like she would eat a baby. Not that she's fat. She just looks hungry in some dangerous way that can't be explained. She's always so nice and friendly. Exactly the disposition of a baby killer." I am currently reading Running with Scissors by Augusten Burroughs and had to share this great quote!

Someone at work today asked me what I thought people visiting the library should be called? I guess there is some debate as to whether or not to refer to people as "patrons," as the word can have bad connontations. And while I answered her question, all I kept thinking was, "maybe we should focus less about what we are calling people and pay more attention to the fact that some librarians out there has no social skills whatsoever!" Seriously-it is okay to come out from behind your books and know how to talk to people! My boss is a great example. I can't have a normal conversation with her without her answering questions in this self-defensy kind of way, as though she has to loudly defend anything she says, or else she answers, awkwardly snort-laughing as she answers my questions in a condescending fashoin. If she talks like this to me and I work with her, what the hell are the patrons thinking! My wish for the "Next Gen" librarians that we are supposed...

Friday, Friday. Today has been one of those really slow days when I want to stand on a desk with cymbals and just starting clanging them together over and over again. Had a guy come in today who spent all day using the microfiche gathering old documents, and then in a flash they were all gone. He did not save them properly so that when he tried to save them on a disk the files were M.I.A. I tried to get one of the "tech" guys who knows more about this shit than I do and yeah, that was helpful. He basically spent 20 minutes doing what I did-checking in every single folder. God, what a terrible feeling I had in my gut. I had to tell the guy "sorry Sir, we can't find where those documents went." I swear to God the man had tears in his eyes. He spent a whole day working on this and for nothing. I am glad that I am going to a party tonight and drinking-I want to forget that sad look in the man's eyes when I told him the files were gone. Anyone else having a bumpy...

And I thought I had too much time on my hands! Nah, this site is funny-what happens when Peeps(yes the candy) visit a library! http://www.millikin.edu/staley/peeps/ Ha ha ha! ~Monster

At work again-swear I never leave this place. But it is totally empty and silent and nice. Helping out with some things for the kids reading program so reading a 4th grade level book and noticing that I am uber envious of some of the things that kids have to read these days. Maybe I was just book sheltered. I remember reading the Bobbsey Twins for Heaven's sake! Anyway, off on a tangent! Just had the best conversation with this 8 year old who was looking for Ramona books (Beverly Cleary). She said to me, "ya know, last year I hated to read, but this year I love it, and I wish I could stay home from school and read." I assured her that I had felt the same thing and told her that I was going to school to become a librarian because I loved reading and books so much. It was a great conversation, and I left her there to explore the numerous Cleary titles that we have here at the library; most that I too had read when I was that 8 year old who wanted to stay home and do nothing...

So, maybe I was getting the worst patrons of the day because I was hungover and this was the sentence handed down to me by the Gods. Better that than a lightning bolt, I guess. I don't know what I was thinking? The little man on my kidney bikes was working overtime after my late night/early morning filled with vanilla Vodka and cokes, good conversation, and good food. I felt fine in the morning-if anything a little energetic and giggly-this probably due to the fact that I was exhausted, falling into bed at a little before 3 am and getting up in the morning before 9am for our weekly Sunday going-out-for-breakfast ritual. The polite smile on my face, my professional smile, you know the one, I'm sure you've perfected yours too-was wiped off my face at 1:20pm when the questions started at work and I started to crash from my happy post-drunk phase. It was one of those days when the Devil on my shoulder was tempting me with all his might, tickling the mean streak in me with his t...